From Brent in Rushford:

A husband and wife come across one of those scales that also tells your fortune.  The husband hops on the scale and drops in a quarter.  A moment later, a white card spits out of the machine.  

“Hey, check it out!” says the husband as he shows her the card. “It says here I’m energetic, bright, resourceful, and a great lover!”

“Yeah,” chuckles the wife, “and it has your weight wrong, too!”